Thanks Amy yes - parts of this reading rankled me too. The immediate thing that came to my mind when reading the law of attraction rule was a few lines from the “Boss Baby” movie - which my kids watch all the time and I’m not really recommending but you know- the gag is the baby is a corporate drone and talks as one - and during a high speed chase Boss baby yells “whether you think you can, or think you can’t, you’re right!” And the big brother says “what are you talking about!?” It’s clearly meant to be one of those platitudes from a generic motivational poster, and also sounds like something Yoda would say (Joseph Campbell and the Power of Myth loves to point out that Star Wars is full of these “fundamental concepts.”) So is it law or attraction? Or just another way we, as overthinking humans, psych ourselves up to do hard things, over and over again, every day? I know research on instructional methods has shown- if a teacher is told a student is advanced, and the teacher is therefore assuming and acting as if the student is advanced, the student will perform better. It becomes part of the social interaction narrative, to expect more from the other and the other fulfills that expectation. I feel like these things are related. If we are more positive with ourselves and with others around us - we see more positivity, this I believe. This is social mirroring. If we ask for more from the universe, we see more and receive more? That I don’t know. I think that is the creative mind at play with the input they see in the world, like the child at play. Either way it passes the time. I loved loved loved the quote from John Briggs about creators courting chance and amplifying some accident in their environment. It felt very core to how I see myself behave in the world, creatively, professionally, and at play or in leisure. I am going to look up whatever book or essay that quote was from.
Really nice summary and expansion of this section on attitude, Lauren. Great example with the pedagogy, too. That totally happens.... and I think the overlay works well. Definitely food for thought and a reminder that our moods and attitudes may have greater reach than we realize.
Kairomancy is a fancy word for a simple process. I prefer terms like being present, noticing--paying attention. These rules are all sort of the same rule. Pay attention and things will come to you.
Except, for me, Your Own Will Come to You. That one doesn't happen for me. I’ve never had a mentor, for example. Okay, I have a wonderful husband. But mostly, I did everything myself.
I still like Moss and admire his breadth of metaphor. But this secret society vibe makes me itch. Rather than thinking we are special, we should celebrate our humanity as awakened individuals who are... paying attention.
The law of attraction isn’t quite the right term. Attitude matters. But it doesn't insure an outcome.
Fran, I doubt you are alone in raising an eyebrow at the “your own will come.” In the real world, I know this to be untrue for me, too, but I have seen unexpected connections sometimes happen in virtual spaces. I’ve never thought of it as a secret club or anyone being special. But I have thought that sometime people stumble upon people (or groups) at a particular moment in time.
I meant that kairomacers may be seen as some sort of secret society. You need the secret code, the 12 steps. But I’m prepared to be sunny about it. Let’s just go out there and pay attention!
Hi all! I’m still here reading! Didn’t comment last week because I was overwhelmed with info. That is probably a chapter I will have to read again, because like some of you I was unfamiliar with a lot of who and what he was talking about.
This week though I felt more connected. The most important message that ‘appealed’ to me, and most likely because it is how I feel and tried to explain in the first week, is: “you know that coincidence is meaningful because you feel it.”(49) This is a way better explanation than my ‘a feather is sometimes just a feather.’ It has to have significance. I guess my biggest hang up is that I am caught between the thoughts of ‘everything is a (insert your own word) if you pay attention’ and ‘I don’t want it all to be so common that I miss the important stuff.’ Does that make any sense?
I also found the idea of doing a daily attitude check something that I had already been thinking about. Maybe not quite in the way he suggested, but trying to adjust my attitude subtly each day and working towards a better one. “What attitude am I carrying?” Those few words could help a lot! If I remember to say them to myself. I think this goes along with how you, Amy, said you had the affirmation mantra going at 3am. Similar ideas.
Maybe it isn’t so much what you are thinking about but how you are thinking about it.
All that to say, I have no idea. But I am enjoying pondering it all with you! Happy weekend to each of you and see you next week!
Thank you for pondering with us and sharing the points of resonance and dissonance for you. I am (still) with you on the feather, but I don’t think (for me) that being open to symbol means I automatically see everything as a symbol. I don’t see frequency or an all or nothing view as the end goal. (I may find with the exercises that I’m wrong about his intent.) I see why you are hesitant to give in... because it sounds like the fear is that everything will be a symbol, which will make them lose power/importance and may also make them no longer seem like symbols. I think you may find that you already know a feather is sometimes just a symbol. Letting your guard down and being even more open won’t change that. --
And I’m replying from my phone/thumbs, so forgive me if this isn’t fleshed out enough. I’m just thinking in response to you -- not lecturing. I have nothing to teach. For me.... while there are birds that are symbols.... every bird I see in my day is not. Every leaf is not. Every turtle is not. But the turtle that spun and charged me..... woosh.
Re: a feather is sometimes just a feather—very true and I 100% agree! For example, I live in a very treed (is that a word?) yard in the PNW and there are many crows in my yard everyday. If I happen to find a crow feather I’m not particularly surprised since it’s not an uncommon occurrence. However, if I happened upon the feather of an eagle or hawk I might pay more attention. In reality, everything we see or encounter is a symbol. Whether or not it has meaning for us, I think, depends on the context. Sometimes that’s hard to figure out, and I do find myself at times a bit confused.
I'm going to say though that even though the crow feather might be common in your yard, I don't believe it is never a symbol. There may certainly be times you walk out, something specific in your mind, and the presence of the feather may mean something.
I don't want us to think that only the "rare" thing in our worlds may be symbolic. It may be that the eagle feather never appears, but there may, over time, be many moments when the crow feather feels significant.
What I take from our "sometimes a feather is just a feather" conversation is exactly that... "sometimes it is what it is" and we shouldn't fall into a mindset where we think every single thing we see has to mean something to us in that moment.
(I know many of us live very routine lives. We may or may not find the "extraordinary" crossing our path day to day. I want to make sure that we allow for the wonder in the ordinary, too.)
Maybe I've had a weird and irrititable week, but this 1/2 of the chapter may have tipped a bit too woo-woo for me at times. However, I did take away a few things from the first six rules. I see that the first rule was knotty to some and I do completely agree that positive thinking alone isn't going to make life all roses and cotten candy. I'm also not fully bought into the thought that it's the "universe" taking my actions and feelings and returning them in kind, so much as it is my own mindset creating the conditions. It did remind me of the learning technique from my two son's elementary school days, though. The school pushed the method of having a growth mindset early and often (which I loved). For me, this embodies the first two rules. If I come into a project or a situation with a kind and flexible mindset I may be met with kindness and flexibility. If the the result isn't what I want or expect, then I will allow myself to search for the win, any win - preparing my mind for those chance instances. A quote posted all around the elementary school was the famous Thomas Edison quote, "I have not failed. I have found 10,000 ways that haven't worked." Find the win.
Side note: The other day, I saw a TikTok from a woman in Michigan, where I also am. Last weekend, the weather started with snow, threw in some rain, snowed some more and is now stuck at such a low temperature that it has made clearing roads, vehicles and walk/driveways extremely difficult. She was scraping the ice from her car and repeating "we don't have earthquakes, we don't have hurricanes, we don't have alligators" over and over. I now know that this is a trend post done by many Midwesterners, but it sure tickled me in the moment and reminded me of this book. I've been saying it every time I've had to shovel the driveway this week! Find the win!
I also really liked the thought of stating to myself "What attitude am I carrying? What am I projecting?" as a way to interact with other people in all types of situations.
The third rule, seemed a tad hard to swallow in the modern, online and algorithm ruled world we live in now. Of course my own will come to me, the tech companies will ensure it. Maybe I need to see this more as 'my own will be given to me on an ad-lined silver plater' (did I mention it was an irritable week?), but it will be up to me to cultivate those relationships and look for any synchronicity that arise from them.
I loved the magical stories from the fourth and fifth rules and also the image of the spiral life thread. This is an intriguing way to view life and as Amy said, I am still thinking about it. It will be interesting to see if there are synchronicities that I am able to see as my spirals wind up and I "take the fork". A search about the power of the medicine bear led me to the art of Norval Morrisseau, whom I've never seen before. His art is fantastic and very much up my alley (ok 3rd rule, I see you). I look forward to discovering more of his artwork.
Rule six - coincidence multiplies on the road. Have you ever had that sensation of waking up in a hotel room, or for me it happens at our cabin up north all the time, and before you're fully awake, before you open your eyes, your brain has created an image of the room around you. The image is of your home bedroom. Then, when you open your eyes, you are surprised and confused about your surroundings. For me, there are about 5-10 seconds before my brain completely recalibrates and I fully awaken where it feels like I have traversed time and space, moved to a parallel universe, slipped through an interdimensional portal. I am not where I am supposed to be. I love that sensation. At least until I realize the bathroom isn't where I 'left' it either. I agree with Moss, new places can create new ways of thinking and new life challenges can do this as well.
I'm excited to see what rules 7-12 open us up to. Have a great week everyone.
Wonderful reflection, Rebecca. I really appreciate seeing everyone thinking about these things, filtering through personal experience, and so on. I doubt any of us will find everything a direct fit, but I think we stand to grow as a result of the thinking. I love your “Find the win” mantra and story. That’s an excellent example and thoughtful approach. You started out saying this 1/2 was maybe too much.... but it sounds like things made some sense here!
I’m also still reading over here! 👋 Many of the thoughts I had were eloquently expressed here already! I know my attitude can make a bad situation better. I know I make situations worse when I have a crummy outlook. But sometimes that’s a tough pill to swallow.
Every story in the chapter seems like something I can connect with (except maybe the one at Gettysburg). But I don’t feel like I would always draw the same lesson from each encounter. But then again, the author has been thinking and learning about this for a long time, and I’m open to his ideas.
I’m also doing a read along of Life in Five Senses by Gretchen Rubin, and these books really go together well! Both books tell me to pay attention, the small things matter, try new things.
I’ll check in again next week. I love reading all your thoughts!
Thanks Amy yes - parts of this reading rankled me too. The immediate thing that came to my mind when reading the law of attraction rule was a few lines from the “Boss Baby” movie - which my kids watch all the time and I’m not really recommending but you know- the gag is the baby is a corporate drone and talks as one - and during a high speed chase Boss baby yells “whether you think you can, or think you can’t, you’re right!” And the big brother says “what are you talking about!?” It’s clearly meant to be one of those platitudes from a generic motivational poster, and also sounds like something Yoda would say (Joseph Campbell and the Power of Myth loves to point out that Star Wars is full of these “fundamental concepts.”) So is it law or attraction? Or just another way we, as overthinking humans, psych ourselves up to do hard things, over and over again, every day? I know research on instructional methods has shown- if a teacher is told a student is advanced, and the teacher is therefore assuming and acting as if the student is advanced, the student will perform better. It becomes part of the social interaction narrative, to expect more from the other and the other fulfills that expectation. I feel like these things are related. If we are more positive with ourselves and with others around us - we see more positivity, this I believe. This is social mirroring. If we ask for more from the universe, we see more and receive more? That I don’t know. I think that is the creative mind at play with the input they see in the world, like the child at play. Either way it passes the time. I loved loved loved the quote from John Briggs about creators courting chance and amplifying some accident in their environment. It felt very core to how I see myself behave in the world, creatively, professionally, and at play or in leisure. I am going to look up whatever book or essay that quote was from.
Really nice summary and expansion of this section on attitude, Lauren. Great example with the pedagogy, too. That totally happens.... and I think the overlay works well. Definitely food for thought and a reminder that our moods and attitudes may have greater reach than we realize.
Kairomancy is a fancy word for a simple process. I prefer terms like being present, noticing--paying attention. These rules are all sort of the same rule. Pay attention and things will come to you.
Except, for me, Your Own Will Come to You. That one doesn't happen for me. I’ve never had a mentor, for example. Okay, I have a wonderful husband. But mostly, I did everything myself.
I still like Moss and admire his breadth of metaphor. But this secret society vibe makes me itch. Rather than thinking we are special, we should celebrate our humanity as awakened individuals who are... paying attention.
The law of attraction isn’t quite the right term. Attitude matters. But it doesn't insure an outcome.
Fran, I doubt you are alone in raising an eyebrow at the “your own will come.” In the real world, I know this to be untrue for me, too, but I have seen unexpected connections sometimes happen in virtual spaces. I’ve never thought of it as a secret club or anyone being special. But I have thought that sometime people stumble upon people (or groups) at a particular moment in time.
I meant that kairomacers may be seen as some sort of secret society. You need the secret code, the 12 steps. But I’m prepared to be sunny about it. Let’s just go out there and pay attention!
Hi all! I’m still here reading! Didn’t comment last week because I was overwhelmed with info. That is probably a chapter I will have to read again, because like some of you I was unfamiliar with a lot of who and what he was talking about.
This week though I felt more connected. The most important message that ‘appealed’ to me, and most likely because it is how I feel and tried to explain in the first week, is: “you know that coincidence is meaningful because you feel it.”(49) This is a way better explanation than my ‘a feather is sometimes just a feather.’ It has to have significance. I guess my biggest hang up is that I am caught between the thoughts of ‘everything is a (insert your own word) if you pay attention’ and ‘I don’t want it all to be so common that I miss the important stuff.’ Does that make any sense?
I also found the idea of doing a daily attitude check something that I had already been thinking about. Maybe not quite in the way he suggested, but trying to adjust my attitude subtly each day and working towards a better one. “What attitude am I carrying?” Those few words could help a lot! If I remember to say them to myself. I think this goes along with how you, Amy, said you had the affirmation mantra going at 3am. Similar ideas.
Maybe it isn’t so much what you are thinking about but how you are thinking about it.
All that to say, I have no idea. But I am enjoying pondering it all with you! Happy weekend to each of you and see you next week!
Thank you for pondering with us and sharing the points of resonance and dissonance for you. I am (still) with you on the feather, but I don’t think (for me) that being open to symbol means I automatically see everything as a symbol. I don’t see frequency or an all or nothing view as the end goal. (I may find with the exercises that I’m wrong about his intent.) I see why you are hesitant to give in... because it sounds like the fear is that everything will be a symbol, which will make them lose power/importance and may also make them no longer seem like symbols. I think you may find that you already know a feather is sometimes just a symbol. Letting your guard down and being even more open won’t change that. --
And I’m replying from my phone/thumbs, so forgive me if this isn’t fleshed out enough. I’m just thinking in response to you -- not lecturing. I have nothing to teach. For me.... while there are birds that are symbols.... every bird I see in my day is not. Every leaf is not. Every turtle is not. But the turtle that spun and charged me..... woosh.
Re: a feather is sometimes just a feather—very true and I 100% agree! For example, I live in a very treed (is that a word?) yard in the PNW and there are many crows in my yard everyday. If I happen to find a crow feather I’m not particularly surprised since it’s not an uncommon occurrence. However, if I happened upon the feather of an eagle or hawk I might pay more attention. In reality, everything we see or encounter is a symbol. Whether or not it has meaning for us, I think, depends on the context. Sometimes that’s hard to figure out, and I do find myself at times a bit confused.
You explained it perfectly. Thank you.
I'm going to say though that even though the crow feather might be common in your yard, I don't believe it is never a symbol. There may certainly be times you walk out, something specific in your mind, and the presence of the feather may mean something.
I don't want us to think that only the "rare" thing in our worlds may be symbolic. It may be that the eagle feather never appears, but there may, over time, be many moments when the crow feather feels significant.
What I take from our "sometimes a feather is just a feather" conversation is exactly that... "sometimes it is what it is" and we shouldn't fall into a mindset where we think every single thing we see has to mean something to us in that moment.
(I know many of us live very routine lives. We may or may not find the "extraordinary" crossing our path day to day. I want to make sure that we allow for the wonder in the ordinary, too.)
That’s very true, and for that reason I have kept a number of found crow feathers 😌 that seemed significant or meaningful at the moment I saw them.
Maybe I've had a weird and irrititable week, but this 1/2 of the chapter may have tipped a bit too woo-woo for me at times. However, I did take away a few things from the first six rules. I see that the first rule was knotty to some and I do completely agree that positive thinking alone isn't going to make life all roses and cotten candy. I'm also not fully bought into the thought that it's the "universe" taking my actions and feelings and returning them in kind, so much as it is my own mindset creating the conditions. It did remind me of the learning technique from my two son's elementary school days, though. The school pushed the method of having a growth mindset early and often (which I loved). For me, this embodies the first two rules. If I come into a project or a situation with a kind and flexible mindset I may be met with kindness and flexibility. If the the result isn't what I want or expect, then I will allow myself to search for the win, any win - preparing my mind for those chance instances. A quote posted all around the elementary school was the famous Thomas Edison quote, "I have not failed. I have found 10,000 ways that haven't worked." Find the win.
Side note: The other day, I saw a TikTok from a woman in Michigan, where I also am. Last weekend, the weather started with snow, threw in some rain, snowed some more and is now stuck at such a low temperature that it has made clearing roads, vehicles and walk/driveways extremely difficult. She was scraping the ice from her car and repeating "we don't have earthquakes, we don't have hurricanes, we don't have alligators" over and over. I now know that this is a trend post done by many Midwesterners, but it sure tickled me in the moment and reminded me of this book. I've been saying it every time I've had to shovel the driveway this week! Find the win!
I also really liked the thought of stating to myself "What attitude am I carrying? What am I projecting?" as a way to interact with other people in all types of situations.
The third rule, seemed a tad hard to swallow in the modern, online and algorithm ruled world we live in now. Of course my own will come to me, the tech companies will ensure it. Maybe I need to see this more as 'my own will be given to me on an ad-lined silver plater' (did I mention it was an irritable week?), but it will be up to me to cultivate those relationships and look for any synchronicity that arise from them.
I loved the magical stories from the fourth and fifth rules and also the image of the spiral life thread. This is an intriguing way to view life and as Amy said, I am still thinking about it. It will be interesting to see if there are synchronicities that I am able to see as my spirals wind up and I "take the fork". A search about the power of the medicine bear led me to the art of Norval Morrisseau, whom I've never seen before. His art is fantastic and very much up my alley (ok 3rd rule, I see you). I look forward to discovering more of his artwork.
Rule six - coincidence multiplies on the road. Have you ever had that sensation of waking up in a hotel room, or for me it happens at our cabin up north all the time, and before you're fully awake, before you open your eyes, your brain has created an image of the room around you. The image is of your home bedroom. Then, when you open your eyes, you are surprised and confused about your surroundings. For me, there are about 5-10 seconds before my brain completely recalibrates and I fully awaken where it feels like I have traversed time and space, moved to a parallel universe, slipped through an interdimensional portal. I am not where I am supposed to be. I love that sensation. At least until I realize the bathroom isn't where I 'left' it either. I agree with Moss, new places can create new ways of thinking and new life challenges can do this as well.
I'm excited to see what rules 7-12 open us up to. Have a great week everyone.
Wonderful reflection, Rebecca. I really appreciate seeing everyone thinking about these things, filtering through personal experience, and so on. I doubt any of us will find everything a direct fit, but I think we stand to grow as a result of the thinking. I love your “Find the win” mantra and story. That’s an excellent example and thoughtful approach. You started out saying this 1/2 was maybe too much.... but it sounds like things made some sense here!
Yep, while writing this out I realized that there was more I took from it than just how new age-ish it was.
I’m also still reading over here! 👋 Many of the thoughts I had were eloquently expressed here already! I know my attitude can make a bad situation better. I know I make situations worse when I have a crummy outlook. But sometimes that’s a tough pill to swallow.
Every story in the chapter seems like something I can connect with (except maybe the one at Gettysburg). But I don’t feel like I would always draw the same lesson from each encounter. But then again, the author has been thinking and learning about this for a long time, and I’m open to his ideas.
I’m also doing a read along of Life in Five Senses by Gretchen Rubin, and these books really go together well! Both books tell me to pay attention, the small things matter, try new things.
I’ll check in again next week. I love reading all your thoughts!